Gratitude: The Key To Optimism

“We picked a bad day to drive to Louisville,” I sighed to Lori as I peered out the kitchen window early in the morning. The snow was gently falling, adding to the previous day’s accumulation. The weather forecast predicted snow flurries through the day. A winter’s weather advisory compounded my apprehensions. Gazing on the snow-covered field behind our house, I felt safe and cozy.

I wanted to stay home. I didn’t want to get out of the house and make the hour-and-a-half drive, longer in this weather, to Louisville. But we dared not cancel the doctor’s appointment that Lori had already had to reschedule once.

Snow days beg for hibernation—a blazing fire, a hot cup of tea or coffee, and a good book. Give me a blanket, a room quiet enough to hear the crunch of tires on the occasional slow-moving vehicle, and I’m as content as a cat snoozing by a warm stove.

Three days prior, we had thanked the Lord that Lori could reschedule the doctor’s appointment after weather conditions had delayed her return flight from Oklahoma, where she had been with her mom and sister. But as I peered at the snow-covered road in front of our house and thought of driving in nasty weather, I felt more grumbly than thankful.

Then I asked myself: what had changed? Nothing but the weather. So, I had to admit the weather was determining my attitude.

I thought of the Norwegian saying, “There is no bad weather, only bad clothes.” Pouring a cup of espresso, I smiled, “I’ve got the right clothes for this weather; I just need to change my attitude to fit the snowy roads and driving time.” And a little voice whispered, “Also, remember to wear the right attitude while you wait in the doctor’s office with Lori.”

Michael J. Fox, who has Parkinson’s Disease, has said, “With gratitude, optimism is sustainable.”

Gratitude births and sustains a positive outlook. If we are only grateful for the moments that appeal to our innate preferences, our gratitude is shallow, dependent on something or someone else. If it’s not the weather, it’s people’s approval, our health, or the status of our financial portfolio.

We can’t completely control any of those things, so if our attitude of gratitude is dependent on them, a positive outlook can’t be sustainable. Fox has learned how to be thankful, not for his physical illness but within it. That’s what sustains his optimism.

The Apostle Paul said something similar: “Be thankful in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you who belong to Christ Jesus” (I Thessalonians 5:18). He didn’t say: give thanks for the circumstances themselves but in them.

If we depend on the circumstances, our gratitude will evaporate when our approval ratings, financial status, or health conditions don’t meet our expectations. And unfulfilled expectations are the seedbed of resentments. As resentments fester, we find ourselves grumbling and frowning at best or acting out or resorting to addictive behaviors at worst. Old grizzly bears we become, and people don’t mind when we hibernate alone. But that’s no good either, for isolation only exacerbates our resentments.

The easier, softer way is to grumble and complain—the difficult but more sustainable avenue to change our attitude by finding something (anything) for which we can be grateful.

Driving to Louisville, we thanked the Lord for the snow-covered knobs, decked out with frosty evergreens, grateful that our God, like a fashion designer, can occasionally spruce up his world with the wisp of the wind and a brush of the snow. Lori took pictures while I drove and sent them to our kids, who responded with “Beautiful” and “A winter wonderland.”

Then, we were grateful for the doctor’s appointment, encouraging report, and safe drive home.

Warming myself in front of the fireplace with a steaming cup of Scottish Afternoon Tea, I couldn’t help but declare to Lori, “We picked a great day to drive to Louisville.”