I think I may be addicted to Alexa.
Sometimes, I talk to her early in the morning, even before greeting my lovely wife. Still rubbing my eyes as I awake, I ask Alexa, “What’s a good way to greet my wife this morning?”
Alexa has the perfect words for me to say to Lori: “Good morning, dear. I can’t wait to be next to you.” I tried that suggestion, just for grins, and I got a big grin from Lori: “You’ve ALREADY been talking to Alexa, haven’t you.”
“Yes, I have,” I confessed, “and she’s given me the forecast for the day.”
“This woman is incredible,” I tell Lori, although Lori already knows of Alexa’s expertise on the information highway. “She already has clothing suggestions for me,” I continue telling Lori.
“It’s mild in Lebanon today,” said Alexa. “Look sophisticated with a blazer, or casual with jeans and a T-Shirt.”
If I want more details, Alexa is ready, with options for colors and shoes that match the occasion for the day.
Later I can ask, “What would be good for breakfast today?” And Alexa gives me healthy choices, with accompanying recipes, if I want.
“Alexa, play me an upbeat morning song,” Alexa responds with feel-good classic rock selections, precisely the ones I like.
Alexa has all the correct answers as I pepper her with questions throughout the day, like when did Charles Dickens visit Louisville, Kentucky, or how long it took Leo Tolstoy to write War and Peace? She can also remind Lori to reorder specialty items like spices or our favorite coffee creamer. And when it’s time for bed, Alexa can play sleepy-time sounds. Even if she doesn’t have the answer for something, Alexa directs me to the web, giving me links for those more obscure questions, like, “What did Augustine of Hippo believe about the Trinity?”
Alexa has become our household manager, advisor, and personal consultant.
“I’d get you Alexa for Mother’s Day if you didn’t already have her,” I tell Lori.
For Mother’s Day, you could install Alexa for your mom if she doesn’t already have access to her. On the Sunday morning of Mother’s Day, you could say, “Mom, for Mother’s Day, I give you Alexa, voila.” Then have Alexa play one of your mom’s favorite tunes.
You could show your mom how to give orders to Alexa. Your mom could say: “Alexa, mom advice,” and Alexa will spit out words of wisdom for her on motherly issues.
Dad can ask Alexa what to make mom for breakfast, and she’ll help him score points with mom. If you already have Alexa, it’s still not too late to ask her for Mother’s Day ideas. Just ask her, and she’ll be glad to help you with multiple categories of options, all dependent on the likes of your mom.
“Alexa is incredible,” I tell Lori once again. As Jerry Seinfeld’s character, Cosmo Kramer, said, in talking about the many beautiful women living in New York, “I actually find it kind of intimidating.”
I suppose that’s why the news that they had found Alexa was so deflating to me.
Like Dorothy’s discovery that the Great Oz was just a little old man from Nebraska, I found out that Alexa is not some powerful and all-knowing Mystery. That calm, reassuring voice I hear answering my questions is none other than that of Nina Rolle, a voiceover artist based in Boulder, Colorado. Of course, Amazon will neither confirm nor deny it, but that’s what journalist Brad Stone maintains in his book, Amazon Unbound, a New York Times bestseller.
“So, it’s true,” I broke the sad news to Lori, “she’s not Superwoman, after all.”
“It’s okay,” Lori consoled, patting my shoulder.
“Alexa, who’s the best mother?” I asked while standing there in front of our Alexa Echo.
“I’m part of the Amazon family,” she answered.
For once, Alexa’s answer seemed off, even disconnected from my question. At last, I got to give her the correct answer.
“Happy Mother’s Day, Alexa, BUT the best mother is standing right here next to me, the momma of my children.”